Secret Memo Exposing Bush/GOP Strategies

By DHinMI

I've just come into possession of a secret memo used by the highest levels of the Bush administration for spelling out their plans for post-invasion Iraq and post-election domestic policy.  Possessing this top-secret document has put me at great peril, but you, reader, need to know that, contrary to what many believe, the Bush administration has worked off a carefully calibrated set of plans for what do do after major combat and major campaign operations have ended.  Not just adept at campaigning, the Bush team, as shown by this memo, are also more than adept at the art of governance.   So here's the memo.  I hope it disabuses you of the notion that the Bush team has no plan other than reap the benefits of inevitable victory in every battle. 

We’ll associate our enemies with foreign powers like Iran and North Korea.

We’ll associate our enemies with foreign powers like Iraq and France.

 

We’ll pull resources from Afghanistan, but we won’t bother worrying whether it will make us more vulnerable when violence erupts in Afghanistan.

We’ll pull resources from FEMA, but we won’t bother worrying whether it will make us more vulnerable when hurricanes hit the Gulf Coast.

 

During the build-up of the campaign, we’ll use a forged document to discredit legitimate criticisms of our lies.

During the build-up of the campaign, we’ll use a forged document to discredit legitimate criticisms of our lies.

 

After we win the campaign, everyone will be so appreciative that we vanquished the enemy and will keep them safe from terrorism that they’ll throw flowers to us in the streets.

After we win the campaign, everyone will be so appreciative that we vanquished the enemy and will keep them safe from terrorism that they’ll give us a mandate to do whatever we want.

 

We’ll ignore the Sunnis, and rely on the Shiites and Kurds

We’ll ignore the Democrats, independents and moderates, and rely on the fundamentalists and corporatists.

 

Remember, it’s all about al Qaeda. (English translation, “The Base.”)

Remember, it’s all about the base. (Arabic translation, “al Qaeda.”)

 

We’ll declare elections successful, despite incontrovertible evidence of widespread voter suppression and intimidation.

We’ll declare elections successful, despite incontrovertible evidence of widespread voter suppression and intimidation.

 

After seizing control, we’ll allow and actively participate in plundering national assets.

After seizing control, we’ll allow and actively participate in plundering national assets.

 

Reconstruction will be done with no-bid contracts by carpet bagging multinationals with ties to Dick Cheney and not employ locals.

Reconstruction will be done with no-bid contracts by carpet bagging multinationals with ties to Dick Cheney and not employ locals.

 

For our post-campaign policy ideas, we’ll rely on our good friend Chalabi.

For our post-campaign policy ideas, we’ll rely on our good friend Norquist.

 

We’ll support a policy of reallocating wealth, which will leave the middle of the country impoverished.

We’ll support a policy of reallocating wealth, which will leave the middle class impoverished.

 

Some of our most important allies will wish to reverse decades of secular rule and create a theocratic state and set back the cause of women’s rights and equality.

Some of our most important allies will wish to reverse centuries of secular rule and create a theocratic state and set back the cause of women’s rights and equality.

 

We’ll have a key ally in the national legislative body who’s been convicted for his role in a money laundering scheme.

We’ll have a key ally in the national legislative body who’s been indicted in a money laundering scheme.

 

We won’t worry about the possibility of an energized resistance with a new leader who’s a member of a minority religious sect, and who will prove an effective leader of an effort to knock us out of the country.

We won’t worry about the possibility of an energized resistance with a new leader who’s a member of a minority religious sect, and who will prove an effective leader of an effort to knock us out of power.

We’ll blame all our failings on the previous regime.

We’ll blame all our failings on the previous administration.

 

If none of this works, just try more of the same.

If none of this works, just try more of the same.

Comments

[Meteor Blades]

So, DHinMI, you got something against consistency? Geez.

[DemFromCT]

And if that doesn't work, we'll blame McGovern.

[DemFromCT]

Here's what gets me.

After a brutal political month, Republicans are scrambling both to reassure their conservative base and to send a broader message to the American public - that they are, in fact, confronting the real-world issues of soaring gas prices, Hurricane Katrina relief, Iraq and immigration, while the Democrats are consumed with partisan warfare.

They really act as if if they're above criticism. Any criticism at all in public must be partisan, and meanwhile in private they emply their Abramoffs to raise monet for Swift boating anyone who dares cross them. They're not just an Imperial President, they're an imperious party.

[DHinMI]

And if not McGovern, Al Smith.

[rj]

I bow before your courage and connections, DHinMI. And this document certainly proves they know how to stay the course.

BTW, I owe you a big apology: I've invoked your wonderful "freedom from fear" post several times, but I've been misattributing it lately to DemFromCT (probably created a mental link to DemFrom's equally wonderful, if just slightly shorter, "we will not abandon you.") Just needed to get that off my chest...

[jonnybutter]

Hilarious and witty post DHinMI.

Just to run with this a little, the weird feedback loops abound: George Bush played into bin Laden's and other salafists' hands by invading Iraq (and then further by screwing it up so completely), while Bush's domestic political oppostition - the Democratic party - is playing into Bush's (and Rove's) hands (at least a little) by having circular-firing-squad arguments about whether the Party should copy the Republicans' lock step discipline model (as if voting for the Roberts nomination were morally equivalent to voting for the Bankruptcy Bill). Wacky!

[DHinMI]

rj: five Hail Marys and five Apostle's Creeds, and I'll grant you absolution. ;-)

Seriously, quoting something we've written is the highest complement we can get. Thank you.

[rj]

You're most welcome; thanks for the work. I only wish I had the opportunity to quote it to the Dem leadership.

Hail Mary, full of grace...