Joseph and his Technicolor Turncoat

by emptypockets

No one should discount our chickenhawks before they've crashed, but there is a possibility that by this time tomorrow Senator Joe Lieberman will face a choice. He could run as a Lieberman, under the party he named for himself. (When did third parties go from being Bull Mooses to just Pig-headed?) Or he could follow the examples of other unelected ubermenschen, like DFA founder and DNC chair Howard Dean or "Current" TV backer and documentary film producer Al Gore, and find a way to continue to serve his party and his principles, ex officia.

Although Sen. Lieberman has shown, in his own Presidential primary and the even-less-dignified campaign against Terri Schiavo's wishes, that he will not pull the plug on anything in a persistent vegetative state, one can always hope he will change. His options are profuse.

With Sen. Lieberman's interest in the Middle East, he could serve well as an ambassador to the region. I hear that Lebanon is lovely, when the skies are clear. Unfortunately, when the skies are cloudy, you need more than an umbrella -- if only we hadn't unstabilized the region with a mismanaged and unnecessary war. So perhaps he would be happier in a quieter place where he could stop to smell the roses: he could open a florist shop in Baghdad. There is a killing to be made in selling those bouquets they will greet us with -- eventually.

Of course, many public officials have a formidable second career on the lecture circuit. Given Sen. Lieberman's speaking style, he could no doubt find work as a speaker at the Abu Ghraib or Guantanamo camps. Evil-doers may resist waterboarding, but they will crack within 30 minutes of hearing Joe's drone. And, thanks to Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez, whose confirmation he supported, Sen. Lieberman won't need to worry about being accused of torture. Guards will, of course, receive earplugs.

He could always retire, and take a few years to enjoy his private life. He can relax and collect the social security benefits he tried to destroy. Like many retired northeasterners, he could move down to Florida. He could reconnect with the people who elected him to begin with -- after all, maybe it's not that he moved away from his constituents, but just that his constituents moved away from Connecticut. And there is a Republican Senate seat up for grabs there in 2010 -- the people of Florida tried to elect you once, Sen. Lieberman, why not give them a second chance?

And if he ever grows homesick for Washington, DC, he could visit Disneyworld. After working inside the Bush bubble, the Magic Kingdom will feel like home. He might never make it inside the Hall of Presidents -- not after treating the Constitution like Mickey Mouse -- but there may be an opening in the Snow White pavilion. Sleepy, Grumpy, Dopey, and Whiney.

Clearly there are many ways Sen. Lieberman could continue to serve his party should he lose the primary today. But the first, and foremost, naturally, is to support the Democratic nominee. No matter who it is, every major progressive blogger will support him -- surely, then, that can't be too much to ask of a party statesman like Sen. Lieberman.

Comments

[B Rubble]

Interesting your note on DC and Disneyworld.
Back in the Reagan era, when I was in the military, the senior officers referred to a tour of duty at the Pentagon as being assigned to Disneyworld (the land of make believe).

I suppose it's an even more apt description now.

[Mimikatz]

I hope this post isn't a jinx.

[Sateandlocal]

Disney Land is in California. Disney World is in Florida.

Leiberman should say he's for term limits.

[freepatriot]

jozo loserman could retire and spend more time with scott mccleland's family

[freepatriot]

pentagon = 5 sided puzzle palace

Lt Col Hackworth

nuff said

[bugsy]

well said
may mr lamont win as he should
i hope mr bush and mr blair are enjoying their vacations
i'm a little surprised they're not doing it together say in bermuda
or the maldives

[MissLaura]

Brilliant.

I also feel that a public figure like him could follow in Bob Dole's footsteps and endorse some sort of pharmaceutical. Viagra is obviously taken. Maybe an anti-depressant? One whose chief distinction is that it makes you feel unreasonably good about your prospects in any given situation?

[AndyM.]

I'll admit from the start I don't agree with a lot of your views, but there is no denying your talent. Normally your writing is erudite, thoroughly investigated and documented, insightful, and challenging. Your grasp of the events leading to the war in Iraq and the subsequent investigation is stunning. Your passion for peace in Lebanon, and your knowledge of the laws of war are wide (as I found out from a response you made to a post I made). But when you start attacking personalities, especially Joe stick-a-fork-in-him-he's-done-already Lieberman (nasally voice?? Joe's drone?? Whiney??) it appears lame. I know, I know, all your fans will shoot me down for daring to criticize you, but its true. I see where you're speaking to the issues at hand, trying to use the subjects you disagree with Lieberman on as issues to criticize him, but from you, it comes off weak. You're way to good an investigator, political detective, writer, and much more to sink to flimsy attacks. I know, you're passionate about your views, and blogging and politics is about endorsing your friends and criticizing your enemies, and chanting the progressive line keeps everyone cheering, but leave the name-calling to Firedog Lake. You haven't posted much here in the last few days, and I've missed it, and considering this post, I still wait to here the powerful EW I disagree with, but can't help respect. Besides, did you read your 'buddy' Byron York's piece on John Conyers's Investigative Report. Beyond the dismissives, you can smell the fear and Byron's realization that the case against Bush is real and strong and ready. I'd rather read your views on that.

[ab initio]

There's always K-Street when Lieberman for Lieberman gets trounced in Nov.

[emptypockets]

AndyM, you're right about emptywheel but I'm not her. :)

[AndyM.]

That pretty much explains everything, huh? That, and I'm 'bout as dimwitted as they come!!

[AndyM.]

That pretty much explains everything, huh? That, and I'm 'bout as dimwitted as they come!!

[Rick B]

Well, Ned won the Democratic primary, and drove Joe out of the Democratic Party. Joe has conceded the primary and promised his supporters he will run as an independent.

Sure proves he doesn't consider himself a Democrat, doesn't it? All the advantages of the incumbency and he can't win the primary? That's a guy who has gone off the tracks somewhere.

Real Democrats will now support the Democratic nominee. Tell me, how blue is Connecticut? And how much does incumbency trump Democratic membership?

What did the Republicans call him in 2001? Sore Loserman? Wasn't that it? Time to bring the label back.

[thebizofknowledge]

I stumbled across your blog while I was doing some online research. I guess I'm not so into the political party system that I would fault him for an Indepedent run, not if he truly thinks he could best serve his state and constituents by doing so.

[thebizofknowledge]

I stumbled across your blog while I was doing some online research. I guess I'm not so into the political party system that I would fault him for an Indepedent run, not if he truly thinks he could best serve his state and constituents by doing so.

[thebizofknowledge]

I stumbled across your blog while I was doing some online research. I guess I'm not so into the political party system that I would fault him for an Indepedent run, not if he truly thinks he could best serve his state and constituents by doing so.